I brined a Turkey and it didn't Suck.

Yeah.. I love to bake and cook, but this does not necessarily mean I am any good at it. I suffer an almost panic attack any time someone is about to take a bite from whatever disaster I decided sounds delicious. My recent crack-like addiction to the Food Network is garnering me a bit more confidence in the kitchen, but my first Turkey was an undertaking of heretofore untold proportions.
First, we have the brine.
MMM, Salty goodness.

Recipe courtesy of the food network:

Ingredients

• 1 (14 to 16 pound) turkey, gizzards and neck removed

Brine:

• 6 quarts water
• 1 bunch sage
• 1 bunch thyme
• 1 lemon, halved
• 1/4 cup kosher salt
• 1/2 teaspoon whole black peppercorns

Rub:

• 1 tablespoon dried marjoram
• 1 tablespoon dry rubbed sage
• 1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon ground white pepper
• 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 1 teaspoon kosher salt
• 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
• 1/2 bunch thyme
• 1/2 bunch sage
• 1 rosemary stalk
• 6 cloves garlic
• 1 red onion, quartered
• 1 cup turkey broth, plus extra if needed
• Quick Pan Gravy, recipe follows

Directions

Brine: In a large pot over medium-high heat, add the water, sage, thyme, lemon, salt, and peppercorns. Bring to a boil, then lower the heat and simmer until the salt is dissolved, and the water is fragrant. Turn off the heat and let the brine cool. Put the turkey in a roasting bag, a large plastic bag, or a bowl large enough to fit it with space for the brine. Pour in the brining liquid and seal or cover. If there is not enough room for all of the liquid in the brine, be sure to at least include the herbs, lemon and peppercorns. Refrigerate the turkey for up to 3 days. When ready to cook, remove the turkey from the refrigerator and discard all of brining liquid and solids. Pat the turkey dry with paper towels.

In a small bowl, mix the marjoram, sage, all the peppers, and salt to make the rub. Rub on all sides of the turkey, and drizzle with oil. Stuff the thyme, sage, and rosemary into the cavity, along with 4 of the garlic cloves, and 1 of the red onion quarters. Allow it to sit on the countertop for about 2 hours to come to room temperature.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Put the remaining 2 garlic cloves, red onion quarters, and broth in the bottom of a roasting pan. Put the turkey on a rack in the roasting pan. Tuck the wing tips under and tie the legs together with butcher's twine.

Put the turkey in the oven and lower the heat to 350 degrees F. Roast, basting every 30 minutes, until an instant-read thermometer inserted between the thigh and the body registers 160 degrees F, about 2 to 3 hours. Add more broth to the bottom of the pan so the drippings do not burn. Allow the turkey to rest under loosely tented aluminum foil for about 10 minutes. Remove the turkey from the pan to a cutting board. Arrange the carved turkey on a serving platter and serve with Quick Pan Gravy.

Quick Pan Gravy:

• Pan drippings
• 1 cup white wine
• 4 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• 4 tablespoons butter, softened
• 3 cups turkey broth
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

Put the roasting pan on the stove top. Remove any large solids, like onions or stalks of rosemary, leaving only the pan drippings, softened garlic cloves, juices and fat. Turn the burner to medium-high heat and add the wine. Using a wooden spoon scrape up all bits from the bottom of the roasting pan. In a small bowl, mix together the flour and butter. Add it to the pan, breaking it up with a wooden spoon, while stirring. Cook for about 1 minute, and then whisk in the turkey broth and stir until thickened, about 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper, to taste, and pour it into a serving bowl.

Here's what really happened:
The day before Thanksgiving (because we didn't thaw it soon enough) I went to my Dad's to prepare the brine. I forgot the kosher salt and had to use Sea Salt.
Error #1.
Next, I forgot the peppercorns and had to use straight up pepper which resulted in the pepper staying on the bottom of the pan when I spooned it out into the turkey bag we use for brining. 
Error #2.
Next day, I get to Dad's early to start the rub. Of which I forgot basically all ingredients on my entry table. Perfect.
So I winged it. Pepper, salt, crushed garlic because naturally I forgot the cloves and some cajun seasoning and cayenne and sage.
Oh, and you bet your butter-loving-fat-girl ass that I mixed a half stick of butter with said rigged up rub and proceeded to rub that on the bird.
Then, of course I didn't understand that I needed a second set of herbs for stuffing the bird with and had to use those herbs from the brining. I have lost count of the errors at this point and my new husband is watching in amazement as I employ several of my favorite but tabooed curse words about how this experience is going. Why did I marry that sarcastic punk.. oh yeah.. the sack.
Of course we didn't let it sit on the counter for 2 hours and of course I didn't tent it with foil when it was done.. Like I said, I am a terrible cook and I get distracted. Charlie Brown was on.
The gravy however, went without a hitch and was delicious.
But here is the crazy part...
So was the turkey, according to my meat eating family. Look at that picture, it was beautiful, golden brown and very moist. No-one gagged, no-one said it needed more of this or that... and it was mine. My first Turkey.
And it didn't suck.